Q: Dear Ava. I’ve been called immature by the last two older women I’ve dated. One relationship only lasted a couple dates, the other was three months. I can’t bring myself to date women my own age, but I’d like to know how to be mature and attractive to older women enough that they would want to be in a relationship with me. I’m making a list of resolutions for the new year and want to turn over a new leaf when it comes to dating. Any suggestions? -Andy
A: Hi Andy. I like nothing more than a man who recognizes when there’s room for improvement. Most people focus on tangible resolutions, but why not focus on dating resolutions. It’s not like there’s a science to it… at least I don’t think so. If you like older women, then you’ll find immaturity is only seen as cute for so long. Cougars want a masculine, strong, confident, man like the rest of the female population. But we also want you to be you.
Here are suggestions to be the mature man a cougar is looking for:
- Plan dates and activities. Women like men to take the lead, even if that means inviting us over for dinner.
- Be open, adventurous, and take charge in the bedroom. Even if you’re less experienced, we’ll appreciate a keen take-control attitude.
- Treat her like a lady. Be a gentleman. Act chivalrous.
- Clean your pad with the idea that it’s ready at all times for a woman’s inspection. Women glean a lot from the condition of a man’s apartment.
- Have goals and dreams. Move towards these. All talk and no action is a turn off for older women.
- Be responsible. If you said you’d help a friend out, do it. If you’ve got bills to pay, pay them. If you have classes, attend them.
- Focus on your woman’s confidence and accomplishment, not the age gap. We are aware, and don’t need reminding.
- Save the farts and fart jokes for time with your guy friends
These resolutions are all good starting points that will help an older woman recognize that you are mature beyond your years. Please leave a comment if you have resolutions you’d like to share.
Need advice on dating, relationships, or sex? SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION HERE, and who knows, you may appear in the next Cougar World newsletter. -xo Ava