Ask Ava: Am I A Weirdo for Wanting Older Women?

Q: Dear Ava. I’m twenty and the women I find myself attracted to are usually in their thirties, sometimes older. I’ve had a few short-term girlfriends my own age and lost my virginity two years ago to one of them. It wasn’t very exciting. The problem is I’m not comfortable talking about my desires with any of my friends. I pointed out an older woman I thought was beautiful to my brother and he laughed at me, said she was twice my age. I just think meeting an older woman would be super cool and I could have an intelligent conversation with her and maybe learn some tips in the bedroom. Sometimes it feels like an obsession, and I’m starting to feel like a weirdo because my roommates wonder why I have no interest in the girls at school. Is it wrong to want to be with older women only or should I force myself to date someone my own age?
-Trevor in Vancouver

A: Hi Trevor. First off, you need to stop beating yourself up. You are not a weirdo. Plenty of young men want to be with, and enjoy being with older women, and vice versa. There are many websites and forums devoted entirely to the cougar cub relationship. This mutual attraction isn’t new or unusual. Don’t feel guilty for your desires. It’s not about age, but what makes one feel comfortable. When we want something badly, we obsess about it, especially if we haven’t had it before. This is healthy and natural.

Don’t date or do anything sexually that you don’t want to do. You will only end up hurting yourself and/or someone else. Being with an older woman is more attainable than you think. You can turn this fantasy into a reality by joining a dating site such as, where you can chat online and meet up with a beautiful experienced older woman. Don’t give up on satisfying your craving. Cougars like a younger man who knows what he wants. Prrrr.

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