Ever wonder why everyone around you is hooking up with cougars online, but you’re barely getting any replies? I’m going to bet it’s not you – but how you represent yourself. With a few adjustments you can start making your online dating life a lot more exciting and actually get on some dates! Consider these three tips to improve your cub dating profile and get you closer to that next dinner by the lakeside!
Show at least three examples. DIFFERENT examples, gentlemen. Three of you in your car while driving wearing three different hats don’t count. Show a change of face angles with different expressions to get away from the two-dimensional image women will start to see you as. Show realistic shots of authentic fun and interaction with others, along with special moments or environments. I certainly don’t go for the tough-guy, no smile look. Anyone will tell you that when your grin is amiss, you’re seen as being disgruntled with life or having an attitude. Another photo recommendation: as much as some people love it, most people laugh and make fun of the beheaded “sexy” shirtless shots. I don’t need rock hard abs (nor do I really care for them), I want a personality to lure me in. This leads me to my next point…
2. Personal Summary
This is your calling card. This is where your personality should shine and start attracting all those potential cougars out there. Make an effort in writing something real and thoughtful, as I promise you won’t impress anyone with one-word answers. Think about it in reverse – would you fall smitten for a woman if all she wrote she likes books and enjoys her job? Not very attractive or alluring, is it? For example, if a dating site asks the question “what are your hobbies?” and you answer: boats. Those single-word answers are as uninteresting as reading a grocery list. Instead, write about what excites you about your boats… “Being on the water in the middle of the summer reminds me of my favorite times growing up. I love the smell of the air, docking the boat anywhere I choose, and being able to jump in the water and swim. I’d love to go for a ride with you!”
See how a description gives a brighter picture and creates more allure, rather than bullet pointing your list of things to do?
As for you boys who say you don’t know how to talk about yourself – I suggest you start. Ask a friend to share a bunch of great things about you, and expand on that. I take the time to let you window shop for me, I’d like to see at least half the effort in return.
3. First Message
You just checked out this woman’s profile who seems absolutely amazing. You decide to say, “Hi”. But that’s all you say. While “hi” can be sweet and flirtatious, it only works if you’re standing face-to-face wearing an adorable coy look to make it clear you’re actually flirting. “Hi” as the only word of choice just comes off as another spoke in the lazy wheel. I actually delete “hi” messages and don’t even bother to look at the author of the profound message I just received. You don’t have to send an essay professing how unbelievably sexy and one-of-a-kind you think your potential cougar is, but if you share in a few sentences at least one thing that turned your crank about the woman you want to date – you’ll likely get yourself a profile view in return.
A little extra effort in building up your profile is a little like building up a good wardrobe – as small as cufflinks are, someone always notices them.