Q: Dear Ava. I’m young and like dating older women, mostly because they have the experience to show me new things. It helps as I’m really shy. One thing that I have been exploring is role playing which often involves a little (or a lot!) of spanking. It took some coaxing to get me into it at first because I just don’t like the idea of hurting a woman, but the women I date seem to know what they want and repeatedly assure me that it’s not about pain at all. But why do women really like spanking? – Chris
A: Dear Chris. Let me also reassure you that many women, young and old, myself included, love spanking. The funny thing is I’d never given all that much thought to why, but men always seem fascinated that we do, so a while back I began reading more about the subject.
Spanking turns women on physically. The ass is a very erogenous zone, but because there are so many layers of tissue, it takes more than a soft caress to hit the mark. You’ll find that many women get very wet, very fast after a little spanking.
It also turns women on psychologically. Many women enjoy feeling submissive so being over a man’s lap or tied up for spanking is very pleasurable. That feeling of vulnerability and at a man’s control can be very titillating. When a spanking is done right, the unexpected connection between hand and bottom, brings an anticipation that can even make a woman orgasm.
And the women you’ve been with are right, 99% of the time it’s not about pain… or humiliation. Spanking should be sensual and fun! Spanking often involves role playing. Think student-teacher, boss-employee, or doctor-patient scenarios. These only help to enhance the experience.
Don’t overthink when a woman wants to try something new or show you something new… go with it and have fun!
For spanking tips, read: Master the Art of Erotic Spanking
Need advice on dating, relationships, or sex? SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION HERE, and who knows, you may appear in the next Cougar World newsletter. -xo Ava